Lately, over coffee with myself, I often find myself thinking about what I am actually doing and what all of this is for.
Work, plans, projects, books, ideas and obligations keep following one another. We are constantly building, fixing, starting and finishing something. We reach one goal and, almost immediately, set the next one before us. As if there were some point after which we could finally say that it is enough. The problem is that this point always remains a little farther away.
For a long time, I believed this was normal. That a person who wants to make something of their life simply has to keep moving forward. And perhaps they do. But moving forward is not always the same as moving in the right direction. We often notice that difference only much later.
It is possible to be very busy and still not know where you are going. It is possible to achieve goals you once considered significant, build a substantial business and accomplish a great deal, only to sit down over coffee one morning and wonder what any of it truly means.
I do not ask myself this because I want to give up. Quite the opposite. I ask because I am increasingly unwilling to spend time and energy on something simply because I have learned that I can endure a great deal. It is no longer enough for me to know that I can do something. More and more often, I want to know why I am doing it at all.
Perhaps the greatest problem is not when a person has no goal. Perhaps it is far more dangerous when they have too many and no longer know why they set them in the first place.
Reshid Dervishi